Million Miles Away
by Krys Xanthina
Summary: ROMY songfic - Goo Goo Dolls "Million Miles Away"


Million Miles Away - (Set after Solitude)  
  
A/N: YES!!! More angsty ROMY. dun worry though. I'm working on some fluff. Its just that my muses are twisted, and they don't do fluff too well. Oh! And Thanks to ishandahalf, who's reviewed nearly everything I've wrote on here. (ha ha, y'missed some! :p). What would I do without ya? (Probably stop working my muses so hard for Fluff. its all your fault! I promise. the fluff is "LackLuster" coming soon.  
  
"Speech" ~thoughts~ (lyrics)  
  
Out of the four girls that had gone out that evening, Rogue was the only one to return. Jean had gone to meet Scott somewhere, Kitty had hooked up with Lance, and Amara had gone with St John. Of course Rogue had come home alone. Who was she supposedly going to go off with? One of the moronic regulars to the club? No way on this earth was she having their grubby hands anywhere near her. There was only one guy she allowed to touch her.  
  
(Friday night, I just got back) (Had my eyes shut, was dreamin' 'bout the past)  
  
The next thing Rogue knew, her alarm was going off. She had to be up early. She wanted to get some training in before anyone else was up and bothered her. As she moved to turn it off, she hesitated, listening to the song that started playing. Goo Goo Dolls "Million Miles Away". His song. Remy.  
  
(I thought about you while the radio played)  
  
(I shoulda got loaded, some reason I stayed)  
  
Tears formed themselves in Rogues eyes as she listened, the Lyrics being too true to not hurt. She sang along softly, not worried about waking people, but more about keeping her own sanity. It had been almost a year now, and he still hadn't come back. She hadn't seen him in nearly a year now. "Wondah what he's doin' nahw?" She whispered to the air, watching her curtains blow in the breeze. "Ah wondah if he even remembahs meh."  
  
(I started drifting to a different place)  
  
(I realized I was fallin' off the face of the world)  
  
(And there was nothing there to bring you back)  
  
Glancing over to her room-mates bed, she noted Kitty wasn't back. Probably spent the night with Lance. Bucket-head wouldn't be happy. Screwing the enemy and all. Probably try and get Lance to use it against her. Rogue sighed. This was stupid. She was stupid. She'd just stood and let him go.  
  
[Rogue luv? You okay?] Rogue smiled a little at her friends sleepy mental voice.  
  
[Fihne Bets. Whatevah made ya think ahm not?]  
  
[I can hear you luv. I can hear the song, and I know you. Want to talk?] Rogue felt her friend preparing herself to get out of bed and walk down the corridor to Rogues room, leaving Warren, who was staying at the Institute for a few days.  
  
[Ya bettah stay right there Bets, or else, Ahll get him ta kidnap ya.] She jokingly threatened, her attention shifting back to the lyrics as the truest bit for her was sung.  
  
(Cuz you're a million miles away)  
  
(A million miles away)  
  
(And there's nothing there to bring you back today)  
  
(Today, oh no)  
  
Yeah, Remy was a million miles away, and he wasn't coming back, no matter what. Rogue picked up his last letter, glancing at the post-mark. Two whole months ago. He hadn't written since.  
  
[I leave ya to it then luv. You know where I am.] And Betsy cut the link, falling back asleep in her lovers arms, feeling a little sorry for Rogue, missing Remy the way she did.  
  
[Ah know Bets. Thanks.]  
  
(I took a ride way downtown)  
  
(The streets were empty, there was no one around)  
  
Rogue stood up, walking down to the ballroom and switching the radio on quietly in there, so she could sing without waking anyone. Maybe if she did, it'd get him out of her system. She knew it wouldn't work, but anything was better than the pain inside, keeping her mind off the rip in her heart which hed caused when he left and only got bigger with each letter. His wife had probably stopped him writing. Found the letters and burned them, and hed let her. Two months with no word. the chances of him coming back were slimmer than ever.  
  
(I went to places that we used to go)  
  
(Seen all the faces that we used to know)  
  
She glanced at the picture he'd enclosed with the letter - one of all of them on Rogues birthday. Hed been promising to give her it and not blackmail her with it for ages.  
  
"Guess this is goodbayhe then Cajun." She closed her eyes for a second. "Ah hate ya Remy LeBeau. Ah hate ya more than ahnyohne. Ah hope ya happy." she finished weakly.  
  
[Rogue?...]  
  
[Ahm okay Jean. Go back ta sleep.] even over the distance Rogue could feel her nod. Why did EVERY damn telepath always know when she was upset?  
  
[Its cos we care about ya luv, and we can feel it.]  
  
[Bets.] Rogue warned, and threw her mental shield up. They couldn't talk to her now, she hoped. Looking once more at the picture of them all, her with cake on her face thanks to Remy, and her threatening to put some on his. She hadn't known about the picture till later that night.  
  
(I'm at the wrong end of the looking-glass)  
  
(I tried to hold onto the hand of the past and then you)  
  
(And there's nothing there to bring you back)  
  
Rogue sighed softly. She just felt so. empty.. since he'd left. He'd taken everything when he went. One day she'd just woke up and he'd gone. Back to his wife apparently. She hadn't even known he was married. All his stuff had been gone - everything that he owned, which was about the same amount as what rogue owned, minus clothing and make-up. She'd made a pile of Their Stuff after he'd left and had it stored in boxes. All the Cuddly toys, the jewellery, everything except the silver ring she wore. She'd never taken it off, and she didn't intend to now. One day, when she was ready. Not today. Today was her final goodbye to him. She'd had her acceptance time, now she needed a week or so to pull herself back together. She'd stop watching for the mail-man, and the Fed-Ex guy. and stop looking at the window every time she heard a bike.  
  
She wasn't his, and he'd never been hers. How stupid was it that she only just realised it now? She'd missed it. He didn't love her. He was a married man. rogue was just. A challenge. A perfect challenge for a thief that can steal anything. Well, no more.  
  
(Cuz you're a million miles away)  
  
(A million miles away)  
  
(And there's nothing there to bring you back today)  
  
(Today, oh no)  
  
She read over the letter once last time.  
  
Chere,  
  
Remy has t' leave chere, but not f'r long.. Gambit promise, he be back. Can' leave m' chere. Wait f'r me.  
  
Sorry Gambit couldn' be dere t' see y' when y' wake up. M' Belle Femme.  
  
Je t'aime Rogue.  
  
Remy LeBeau  
  
(Cuz you're a million miles away)  
  
(A million miles away)  
  
(You're just a million miles away)  
  
(A million miles away)  
  
Rogue placed the letter back in her pocket, despite wanting to do something like tearing it up.  
  
"Ahm sorry Gambit, but Ah Aihnt waitin' on someone who lied ta me, an' is married. Ah aint that much of Ah foohl."  
  
(And there's nothing there to bring you back today)  
  
(Today-ay-ay, oh no!) 


End file.
